Heart messages

I think a lot about what it means to listen. To listen to our selves. Do you hear conflicting things? I feel like moment by moment one self speaks and then the next. I assign them names: heart, ego, Nigel. Physical personas: wise woman of the woods, puppy,  unicorn. Sometimes they come together in a wise council. Of course I like them to be sitting around a round table, a la the Knights of Camelot, or gathered in a meadow, held within a fairy ring. More often they seem to wandering around on their own, just saying confusing things. 

I say that the heart or soul voice is quiet but is it? Is it actually just overlaid by distractions. Its messages this year have been consistent: be soft, go gently, let delight lead, sit quietly, look around you. Often it feels in conflict with what the world asks of me. Or more accurately what I believe the world is asking of me. What I interpret. What I'm conditioned to believe. I'm making a series of little cards to capture some of what I hear that feels wiser, truer, more loving. 

I've taken a batch of old business cards and painted over them. That action has felt powerful in its self. To use something made for the corporate world for this inner, softer world. I'm using shimmery watercolours and my favourite colour ink. These are things that my heart approves of.

I hope that these will be something to turn to when other things are louder and I feel out of alignment. When I get swept up in a story of saving the world rather than living this life. When the narrative says 'be a good xxx' isn't that a red flag? What does it mean to be good? Who gets to decide? Is it actually worth aspiring to? When there are lots of conflicting thoughts running through my mind, I find it helpful to hold on to something tangible made in a more harmonious moment. To settle in to my heart and to ask questions without need for an answer, to dwell in possibility.

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