Showing posts from May, 2014

Ordinary magical

Oh. This. Holiday! Photos are mostly trapped on my phone, words are swirling, both will be indulged in depth in this space I am sure. Till then two things I needed to celebrate today. 1) The moment of purest, everyday magic that opened up my day. A glorious ribbon of light, snaking in under the blind and held fleetingly in the gauzy curtain. I hope some of the wonder and awe I felt has been captured in the pixels above. It was joy. 2) I am returning each day to a poem that dropped in part in to my inbox in a newsletter (Thank you Heather Day ) earlier this week. It says everything I most needed to hear that day and it makes me feel calm and whole and present to read it. (I haven't got a volume of Rumi's poetry so I am relying on various sources on the interwebs to cross reference (thank you!) for reproduction, they seem to agree and it's working for me) Response to your question - Rumi Why ask about behaviour   when you are soul-essen

The calm before the journey

Just downloaded a new e book (The Goldfinch) and am finally packed and mentally prepared for three weeks of fun, fun, fabulous holiday time, culminating in Squam. Am so excited to see what unfolds in the next few weeks. Ready to see what it will bring not what it will take. Ah happy as a cat on a lap.

A little find

The brambles and I have made an uneasy peace in our garden. They are supposed to stay in the wilds at the bottom but like to creep along the edges of our long narrow garden when I'm looking the other way, always seeking more land for their wilds while I would like a few softer plants to have their sway. A few months ago, when snipping rather effetely at them in an effort to check them a little before they got their spring vitality and made a push for the house to trap us forever, I found a little holly sapling in their midst. The bramble snakes had filled an old cold frame but somehow a holly seed had found its own little niche in there, a very welcome intruder! Mama came to visit this past weekend and so I sought her plant wisdom, to first check that it was indeed a holly and secondly that it was in an okay position. Happily there was good news on both fronts.  We have a lime tree that is going to break my heart a little this coming winter when it has to be cut down. It's

Accepting what is...

It has been a week of crashed out, feeling much more poorly than I have for a long time and on Monday that had me in tears railing against the unfairness of still being ill. Then gradually as I've rested this week I've read and watched things that helped me realise that fighting with the reality of where I am gets me nowhere but trapped in that place of protest and suffering. By accepting the need to rest and recover some energy it's coming back all the faster than if I tried to push myself well. There is a state when I am so low with this illness that I almost lose sight of who I am and can believe almost anything (so long as it's awful!)of the situation, including that I will never be well despite a whole raft of evidence (and more and more lately) to the contrary. Yesterday I felt flickers of energy creeping in and picked up two balls of mohair and am now knitting a cloud* as I let my body heal. Let this be a step on the path from accepting what is to truly loving